Wow, long time since my last update. Haha. Many things have happened as usual. Think my absence online has been causing loads of people to wonder. Lol. Coupled with the fact I've all but disappeared.... Been sick. Haha. So taking a long rest. Cant afford to burn out, can I? Been doing loads of thinking too. And trying to numb myself as well I suppose. Gaming... Lol... Cos I cant seem to stop thinking. And for the record, I'm an absolute failure. Haha. My training has barely been put into effect. Of course, I have not totally thrown it aside... But I'm making much much lesser progress than I thought I would. My only excuse? No one can keep up that kind of intensity forever... Haha... Lousy me....

The Cheers thingy, I've been thinking about it. No doubt that Miss Dorene was doing her best to help us. When we were leaving, she did get Miss Lee to pass us the forms. And as I thought about it, I realised that the main issue might have been with Miss Chew. We are mostly SIFE members. As we have seen from her taking direct action with regard to us, the school does care for the result of the competition. She might not have wanted us to detract our efforts... Of course, could be because people like me have too many activities, and they doubted our availability.... Sorry then people, if that's the case. Haiz. On to the next game, but then, I never like to lose.

Bloody problem with the two is still there. Very troublesome to type sia. But feel like typing on. Haha. For all the stuff that I missed out, sorry guys. Esp to the Pre-U Seminar Team, I was quite disoriented, forgot to tell u ppl that I was sick. 1 more week to the release of the results, wonder if I should be getting excited or depressed. Definitely won't be doing as well as last sem. Oh well... Crap. CCA Points updated to 149. Amazing. Haha. 153 points more to catch up with Alvin. Lol. Starting on my 3rd gold. :D Dang it though... wonder if my efforts will be worthwhile in the end.

Been reading a lotta my old books also. No, not on biz etc. Fiction. Lol. Missed those stories actually. Feel like I've been restricting my imagination and language. Haha. Writer's urge? :D Dang it, I'm just crazy. Stressed sia. My bro cant make it to poly (as of now, appeal dateline is today), but he gonna try RP later, so all the best to him. And there's still so much work to do. Chess Camp, Pre-U Seminar research, SIFE, Leo Club... Ooh... Serve China 07? Chess Competition? Erm, the stuff I want to do? Haha. I need some new games sia. Playing against the AI gets boring after awhile... (for dota AI, use bloodseeker to pawn... I racked up 8k gold b4 I went back, at full life? Wtf... Just focus on last hit/deny with blood bath) I want RPG!!! Lol. A good game nowadays takes like 3+GB. When games used to be 1GB or so, dl was viable. Now it isnt. Lol.

Was wondering... what really is right and wrong... Something never meant to happen did, and I just cannot keep my focus anymore. No religion for me to fall back on too... Haha... The only beliefs I subscribe to are the stuff I read and think about. May the world grant me strength, that I may resolve this within myself to gain peace.... Hmm... Hercules just sprang to my mind. Lol. Loved that movie. Maybe I should go find the disc and watch. Hahaha... The measure of a hero isnt by the size of his strength, but the strength of his heart.... But who needs to be a hero? Then again, why am I aiming to reach the top? Sometimes, things just cannot be explained... Can they? I can win so many, but alas, fall prey to none other than myself...

HaX0r....

Remembering what life is.....
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